Sorry, Elsa

Life is a series of choices right? We've all heard it and I happen to believe it. I believe I have a choice about almost everything in some way.
When those choices involved primarily just me they seemed fairly easy to make. When choices involve the rest of my family those valued options suddenly become terrifying. At least to me.
Currently we have made a plan to move in 5 months from SF to Hawaii. This decision began about a year and a half ago when I laid down in bed and suddenly couldn't get up for weeks, then months. It made us realize how quickly life could change and created fear in my husband and I that my health issues were only going to get worse. I remember saying, as I went through testing to figure out why I couldn't walk, move or at times read or comprehend the world around me, "if this is it then our life needs to change". We needed to go us on living life as if it was a limited commodity.
And so began the discussion, research and planning. Not only did we realize we needed to embrace life in the face of the uncertainty of it, but we also realized if we stayed here nothing would change. My health just didn't seem to be able to get better here.

Last year we spent a hefty amount of time travelling. It just so happened that births, weddings, family trips, work trips and more all fell within a 5 month period of time. It was a lot.
Every single place we went was warmer than it was at home. And every single place I was able to participate in life more.
[Background: It never gets truly hot here and barely even very warm. And if it does get warm it's for a very short burst of time in the middle of the day. The temperature can change more than 30 degrees in one day/night and quickly. And it's damp. So very damp. Our humidity level was 100% yesterday. But only 48 degrees at 3pm. It's the same idea as when it's humid and hot- the humidity enhances the heat. Well humidity does the same thing with cold. It takes the cold deep through your clothes and into your bones]

So we realized after 3 trips to warmer places that there was a huge discrepancy in how I felt physically in the consistently warmer weather vs here.

"And if you think about our annual trip to hawaii, you are always more active there.."
"I am. The heat definitely helps. The consistency of weather also I think. No sudden drops in temperatures there. Is it humidity maybe?"
"No, you felt better in Denver too.....Maybe we really do need to move"

The conversation to move went through several places, narrowing to Costa Rica and Hawaii for many reasons starting with the consistency of the weather. We happened  to have our annual trip to Hawaii after that conversation and once again the difference was obvious. Especially since this time I flew to Hawaii alone with both kids and still functioned better those first few days alone than I do at home with help.
When we arrived home the Change was instant. My darling husband came home from work the following day to me in bed and immediately said
"Ok which Hawaiian island can we afford to live on?"
And so the journey began.

Shortly after this decision started to become clear we scheduled a trip to the big island of Hawaii. M and I had been there but wanted to see it again with the eyes of "living there". After our time there we realized two things: I truly did feel better there regardless of sleep, help, stress or any other "vacation variables" and two: the big island was definitely not for us. 

For medical reasons as well as transition for the kids we moved our focus to Oahu just outside Honolulu. 

And we have a winner. And did I mention the fact that I have wanted to live in Hawaii for 30years? How does it feel to have a dream come true? Actually quite a bit scarier than one might think....